tarot of loving

she had started planning dates without me
inviting me afterward
*you are welcome to come*
the gap
between her and her 8 yo son was nonexistent
they were one
i could love both of them
but not be in a loving relationship
when i was a cheerleader but never a player
her mind never had to work that way
years of traveling
international ultimate frisbee tournaments
takes a certain kind of person
love loving relationships was not a priority
actually
she almost forgot to have kids
no suitable donors
so she bought one
donor
with a facebook page
of all the sons and daughters
horrific idea
lovely beautiful boy
trouble wiping his own ass
or deciding what to have for breakfast
for a time
my influence was recognized
appreciated
some positive changes did occur
but the yelling in the house
continued
*mom!*
are you going to just keep yelling
*mom!*
you could go find her
*mom!*
what’s your question
*how cold is it outside?*
and after the swear jar was overflowing
she banned the swear jar
it was just her way
of expressing
what

4-3-24

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