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Hear the discussion of this chapter free on YouTube: Spreading Joy
Let’s start with joy.
If you’re happy and you know it… Do the thing. Share it. Vibe with others. Open to the experience of vibrant life all around you. Put down the phone. Open your eyes. Seek connections.
I guess this is easier said than done for a man. I understand BRF (bitch resting face) is a defense mechanism. A rage against the “just smile” bullshit floating around all sides of the sexual battlefield. Maybe that’s part of the experience of life I’m not tuned into. I’m not looking for a partner: sexually or spiritually. I’m content in this liminal state. I’m exploring and pushing into self-reliance and the calm that comes from zero relationship conflict.
Think about that. Zero conflict.
The downside, of course, is potential loneliness and ennui. I suffer neither of those. My last partner was fantastic. She had all I hoped for in a relationship. Well, there were a few things that were not working, or I suppose, we’d still be together. But get this, I get excited about my return to a house occupied by two cats, a brother and sister named Hunter and Sid. Excited. No one to tell about my day or ask if I’m hungry. I am hungry, but for more than I was receiving in the relationship. Even positive interactions require attention and often result in differences. She says she doesn’t care what’s for dinner, then rejects my three ideas.
Today, I spread joy in a different way. I have a confident swagger about me. I share my joy freely until I am given the indication that someone is not in receiving mode. It’s okay if you’re busy, distracted, on the phone. I don’t require anything from you, especially not a smile. You will have to pay for your avocados and garlic at the end of our journey together.
I give kindness and joy. “Hi, how are you this morning? I’ve been looking forward to seeing you again. How is your daughter doing?”
Two days ago, during a shift, a couple came through my line and the woman said, “I read your book, the one you recommended, the one with the hard title.”
“The Third Glass?”
“Yes. It was wonderful. You really loved her.”
“That is true.”
“I was hoping as I read it, you write beautifully by the way, that she would change. You were so patient and devoted.”
And that’s why we do it, write. Someone is touched by my story. Takes a few ideas back into their own lives. And when they celebrate with me, they are sharing their joy about my joy and it’s a joyfest.
Hope springs eternal in the joyful person.
See you in the checkout line today at 10 am. Bring stories about your life.
The hope I see in others
becomes the hope I have for myself,
my life, and my own journey.
– The Happy Cashier
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