LISTEN on: Apple Podcasts or Podbean or YouTube
Hear the discussion of this chapter free on YouTube: My Male Gaze
I’m a man. Sorry for that fact. I am hetero and happy in my own skin. I understand that my gaze is the “male gaze.” I have that. I do that. Even in my “mindful” writing, I attempt to temper my own perspective.
That said, yesterday during my eight-hour shift I ran a little survey to understand my own tastes. Not sexualization. Not predatory. Just about me and my own proclivities. I seek to understand more about my own relationship to women. Maybe this helps.
In this river of life, the beautiful, health-conscious, and affluent parade by my register en masse. I estimate that I serve anywhere from 70 to 150 people a day in my role as the Happy Cashier. I started a count yesterday. The score I arrived at by the end of my shift was this: 5-17-102.
5 women had IT. The glow, the energy, the self-awareness. Several of them have become “friends.” We notice each other, seek out a snippet of conversation, and move along with our lives. We share some little tidbits about life, things we’re excited about.
17 women had everything: beauty, confidence, fitness, and joy.
Let’s say this: these 22 women, for me, represent the top 10%. The men in the store follow the same ratios.
I’m somewhere in that percentage for my age. I’m fit, health-conscious, attentive and awake. I observe myself in my role, my actions within the store, and my joy. I am exuding joy. The truth is I don’t treat the top 10% of customers, men or women, any differently. I love all my customers, regardless of their levels of fitness, beauty, or obvious economic or age differences.
For comparison, I also shop at a local general grocery store for some things, and the difference is obvious. Mainstream Americans don’t take care of themselves very well. They eat crap. They don’t exercise. They carry more stress than most of us by loading on the carbs, sugars, stimulants, and crap food. I’m sorry, but health is a lifelong process, not something a binge diet, an injectable weight loss drug, or cosmetic surgery or glamour makeup is going to help.
A natural beauty, men and women, show several similarities, not represented in a more average grocery store. I don’t think I need to give details; you know what I’m describing. It’s sad when I’m walking the aisles of the normie store. Please, please, please, people: take responsibility for your health, livelihood, and what you put into your body.
Eat better food. Drink little or no alcohol. Get plenty of rest. Find the things that excite and activate you. Point your life at empathetic and supportive tasks and conversations. Love everybody. Give to organizations you believe in. Be authentic. Awake. Mindful.
See you in the checkout line tomorrow.
[Listen to the Deep Dive explore the concepts of The Happy Cashier.]
The hope I see in others
becomes the hope I have for myself,
my life, and my own journey.
– The Happy Cashier
the happy cashier index < previous post | next post >
ALT: Botisatva’s Bookshelf | The Happy Cashier Podcast
RESOURCE: Roadmap for Retail Workers from the Happy Cashier
Please check out my latest book on mindfulness and daily practices.
