where have you gone

it was a slip
i let you go
mistake
loss
back into the abyss you lept
it was sleep
the goal
the remedy
i cannot forgive
either of us
for this untethering
a rambling jumble of feelings
letters
images
as you faded from view
doing whatever the fuck it is you are doing
to lose coherence
i trusted the process
god
i did not trust you
but
wanted to be your friend again
your dad again
i gave space and a clean place to land
you jumped at hour five

12-29-23 – leap

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