the audiobook version is streaming free on YouTube: Poptarts
I buy them because my daughter loves them. Cherry PopTarts. But when she’s gone, they are hard to resist. Resist I will, however, because I need to get fit, and eating a PopTart is never the way to go. Today, I’m learning to navigate the junk food aisle.
As a family, my wife and I shared the shopping. I tended to make the runs to the local grocery store, on the way home from work, “Can I pick something up for dinner.” I was that kind of husband.
She used to make the Costco runs on the weekends. And, god bless her, she’d take the kids. I’d no more want into that movie than… well, I’d rather stay home. Probably to nap. Staying up late does take its toll on your energy and daytime running lights.
And the kids would come back all excited and happy. They usually got a treat of some sort. And there were these huge boxes of food in the Prius. I’d unload with my wife and it was all I could do to hold my tongue. Not every time, but at least every other time, she came home with about 40% junk food. The exact shit I was trying to keep from eating. But hey, the kids shouldn’t have to go without because I can’t control my lust for sugar. Right?
The kids loved Sweettarts but we didn’t need a 5-lb bag. And fruit rollups, sugary sodas, all kinds of popsicles, and… Well, you get the idea. And you can’t blame her, going to Costco with kids in tow was a crazy hard task. Maybe if I’d gotten up and played football with them or something… But a trip to Costco was an event and they always wanted to go. Because they could pick out their favorite crap.
I recall several times, the very next day, when I had dinner duty, looking in the pantry and refrigerator and saying to myself, “There’s not one fkin staple in the house.” And I’d go to the local store for some tilapia or chicken. GRRRR.
And it wasn’t just the crap that the kids ate, it was the crap that was staring me in the face 24/7. You turn down a coconut popsicle at midnight when you’re sad, tired, and alone. That part was my fault. I couldn’t blame my growing girth on my wife, but GD do we have to fill the house with all this junk food?
Halloween, Easter, Christmas, Valentine’s… wasn’t that enough? Did our house have junk shelves year-round?
A funny thing happened as I moved out and had to fend for myself, both in the grocery store and at home. I didn’t buy junk food. Sure I’d get stuff when the kids were going to be with me for the weekend, and I still do grab pop tarts for them, but I don’t fill the house with it. My son asks me to cut him an apple almost every night. Sure it’s a few more steps than grabbing a fruit rollup, but damn, one of them is actually good for him.
Staring at the pile of Cherry PopTarts in my pantry in my solo house, I am tempted, but I have a strategy when shopping with my kids. If they want a treat of junk food (ONE!) I make sure it’s something I don’t crave. PopTarts are a hit, but I don’t like Cherry, perfect, it’s my daughter’s favorite.
Late at night, I have a hard time not ripping into one of the shiny packages of goodness. And every day until they are gone, I have the same temptation from time to time. I needed to learn another discipline: Listening to what my body needs. What it needs right now as I’m trying so many remembrances, is a walk, not another cup of coffee.
I love PopTarts. PopTarts don’t love me back.
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