love poem on demand

for my birthday, she said
i want a love poem
except
the time had passed
we were heading apart
she had limited relationship skills
and zero interest in being friends
with my kids
at first
i was so grateful for the rescue
she had provided
i thought *recovery* would be enough
to hold me fast
keep me optimistic
but the dream
occurred more than once
i was in a high place
clowning around with the edge
until i was falling
with a sense of fear and acceleration
that continued
long after i was awake
navigating
passively hostile waters
from a high hotel room in Spain
with a woman i had grown to blame
for the failure

5-23-23